so what do you do when you’re livid?

18 01 2010

Now that I’ve had a chance to retract my adamantium claws after some frustration recently, I’ve been thinking about the process of healing after a difficult incidents like this.  Thank you to everyone who wrote encouraging comments, emails, called me & sent me carmels via carrier pigeons. I’m thankful for your kindness and the pigeons only ate 1/2 of the carmels!

What do you do when you’re angry? hurt? frustrated? bitter? Why would I bother to even write about difficult experiences, or how I’m dealing with them? why? Because I’m betting that every single one of you have some sort of shizzle you’re dealing with in your life too. And we all have to make choices about how we’ll respond to people who hurt us, situations that are less than ideal and the fallout that comes from conflict. So, why the heck not blog about them & encourage one another to live out love. After all, as Elvis Costello

he's the best on vinyl.

once sung “what’s so funny bout’ peace, love and understanding?”

I was struck that in the midst of dealing with some painful things in my life, that there are thousands of others dealing with the wreckage of their lives in Haiti. And it reminded me why I need the gospel. I was reminded that because Jesus is able to give an unceasing, unchanging love in the midst of pain and brokenness, I can forgive instead of being resentful. I can triumph not because I’ve reamed someone out about what a jerk they are, or what wrongs they did to me, but because as St. Paul said “in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

I need Jesus to continue to heal me from the inside out, so that I can get my eyes off myself and my own issues and focus on how Jesus leading me and my community to bring his love, power and healing to a hurting world. And this is only possible through Jesus- I can’t be nice enough, tell myself to get my mind off my problems, or put on a happy face. The tapes just keep playing in my head.  I simply do not have enough love for all the jerks in my life, let alone this world. But Jesus does, and he is able to give me (and you!) his love. Which is totally, totally rad. This is the essence of the gospel, the essence of what Christians are meant to believe and live. If anyone tells you differently, they’re just bamboozled.

So, how did Jesus minister his love to me to help me heal? Well, funny you should ask. He did it in ways that would make me feel most cared for, which looked like:

  • A great date with my husband. We ate Kentucky Fried Chicken which we had been craving for weeks but continually talked ourselves out of because it is ridiculously unhealthy. We saw a movie by our favorite director, Wes Anderson. And we loved, loved The Fantastic Mr. Fox. It was just the thing to cheer my spirits!
  • A great date with a friend. Doing yoga with one of my girlfriends helped to release a lot of the tension I had been carrying around and reminded me that I am not in control of anything though I would so love to believe that to be true. It reminded me that God is way bigger than my problems and the problems in this world.
  • Dance parties. The first with my son to the Urbana 09 worship cd. We jumped around and shook our hips and praised Jesus. Worship is actually one of the most counter-cultural things I think that Christians do. What? Praise God for his goodness in a world that is so absolutely broken? Hecks YEAH! Because even when everything changes for the worse, God remains the same.
  • My second dance party was a solo one, and I rocked out while I cleaned with my ever-present ipod friends:

brittney

Gwen

Rhianna

Lady Gaga and Justin Timberlake showed up for a little while too, but it was mostly just the four of us sweeping the kitchen floor and shaking our booties.

I think sometimes Christians forget that God can use anything to remind us of his love and his presence. Perhaps because we’re so afraid that it is escapism into something besides God that we fail to realize that God may want to remind us we have bodies to dance, eat, and celebrate that we can find joy in the midst of pain because of his love. For some reason in my life that is often embodied in pop culture. And fried chicken.

What are ways that you deal with your anger? What helps you when you’re in a funk because of some conflict? I’m not looking for a dissertation, but how about your top three list?


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Categories : exercise, friendship, inner world, spirituality

yogi santa

21 12 2009

even santa gets stressed out during the holidays

Even Santa partakes in the downward dog to work off some of those holiday cookies and eggnog :) Are any other ladies feeling like Spanx will become your new best friend in 2010?  It’s never too late to join in the 12 days of yoga challenge in December. Perhaps you too have realized that travel makes consistent exercise more difficult- and around this time of year it can feel easier to sit comatose after a big meal than get up and move.  Thankfully, this past weekend as I’ve been in indianapolis celebrating an early Christmas with my in-laws, my sister-in-law  Rachel

found a place for us to drop-in for a yoga class that one of her friends teaches!  The day ended up being a fick ladies outing beginning with yoga, moving on to facials, out to lunch for sushi and ending with a day of shopping. It was wonderful!

everybody warrior pose!

I found the “yogi santa” card at Invoke Yoga Studio and had to buy it- it was just too perfect during this 12 days of yoga challenge. The only other time I have taken a class was through Grand Rapids Parks and Rec & it was a pilates class- I loved it even despite the environment of the Ottawa Hills High School Cafeteria.  Invoke was beautiful, and offers drop-in classes perfect for checking things out to see if you want to commit to joining a session. Most places offer things like this, and actually will give you a credit towards other sessions if you’ve paid for a few drop in classes.

If you know of a yoga studio near-by, check their website or give them a call to see if they offer similar deals.  They may even have January specials beginning in a few weeks- what a great time to try something new to stay healthy this year!

I so enjoyed being in a class with other people, mostly women.  Rachel and I were commenting that when we’re exercising by ourselves, it’s too easy to just put in the time and not really push ourselves.  Well, I was sweatin’ in this yoga class- and even though it was more challenging, I didn’t even realize that it was an hour long class because it felt so good! There is something great about having the accountability of having a class you’re part of to stay consistent with exercise.

Indy's #1 pick for yoga studios!

I also really liked that the instructor could adjust my positioning to help me gain the full potential from various poses- something that you don’t have the benefit of from doing a dvd at home. So, that puts me up to a total of 6 days (30 minute sets) of yoga- 1/2 way there in the 12 days of yoga challenge! Did I mention it’s not too late for you to start the challenge for this month?

I’m hoping that our family will be able to join the YMCA in GR this new year- I’d love to take a mom & toddler swim class with Reuben and to be able to take some yoga classes a few times a week. I intentionally decided not to run outdoors this winter. I did last year and was super motivated to get outside at least three times a week. I’d bundle up, put on my wool socks and brave the cold winds convincing myself just to keep going because I’d soon warm up. But this year as soon as it became colder, I looked outside at the cold winds blowing and thought- nope, not gunna do it, wouldn’t be prudent :)

I think sometimes that’s how we can get derailed on exercise- feeling guilty that we’re not doing a certain kind of exercise so we give up all together.  But, it really doesn’t matter if you’re running, walking, skipping or doing cartwheels to stay active.  The point is to keep moving to make exercise a part of your life.  It felt good to give myself permission to stop running and decide to walk and do yoga instead.  And strangely enough, I’ve looked outside on some sunny cold days and thought- what a gorgeous day for a run!

So, what kinds of ways are you hoping to make exercise a priority in the new year? What has been working for you? How are you doing on the 12 days of yoga?


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Categories : exercise, travel

Yoga pants: God’s gift to women everywhere

16 12 2009

Sometimes I even do yoga in my yoga pants. Just not this past week.

strike a pose- a warrior pose :)

When it comes to relaxing, this is basically my uniform. And that’s what I’ve mostly been doing this past week. Well, actually not relaxing at all. Stressing out about the stuff I need to get done before my sabbatical in January, figuring out time to do all the Christmas prep of wrapping, baking, getting food poisoning, hosting parties…and as Elaine once said “yada, yada, yada.”

Well this week it was time to slip on the yoga pants and glide into a chaturunga pose- If I’m going to do 12 days of yoga this December, I need to keep going! What helps you to get motivated when you’ve had a longer break from exercise than you intended?

For me this week I was very motivated to relax and stretch my tired muscles. I had been feeling exhausted and tense after last week. Though it also would have been nice to sit on the couch, I could feel the need to release some tension, stretch and breathe. Whenever I need to do some relaxing yoga I pop in Kathy Smith’s Project You Core/Flex DVD.

A relaxing and energizing 20 minute yoga workout.

Dave bought this for me at goodwill after I mentioned that I wanted to get some yoga dvd’s. Doesn’t that make so much sense that you could find great exercise tapes at goodwill?  So many people get stuff with great intentions and then they never use it, don’t like it, or get tired of it. Actually, the project you dvd is so cheap on Amazon, you can probably get it with shipping for under $5. Once I bought it, I burned it to my computer so I can do it wherever I go.  I typically never travel without my laptop so it’s been great to have when I need to wind down after a long day of meetings or want to wake up early and do some light stretching.

Actually, I even encouraged my colleagues to join me over a lunch hour at some meetings this past October.  We had been sitting in horribly uncomfortable chairs in a room at a church. And typically what happens in these meetings are: talking, eating, sitting, talking, eating, more sitting. repeat. It was so much fun and helped to alleviate our numb bottoms! There were even a few male colleagues that joined in and said it helped them to stretch after going running.

So, maybe you’ve hit a wall like I did with the 12 days of yoga this month. Just remember to stop. breath. stretch. remember that Christmas is about sweet little 8lb 5oz. baby Jesus, investing in others, and spreading some love. Taking even 20 minutes to do some yoga might help you to refocus on what’s important in life!


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Categories : exercise

12 days of Yoga! Feeling less stress yet?

9 12 2009

Last week when I was in Wheaton for a class doing Yoga was a great way to wind down at the end of the night, especially after sitting all day. I don’ t think I could ever do a desk job again- I’m too antsy.

This week I haven’t done any yoga because I came down with the flu or something like it. I just sent Dave out to get me some soup- since I’ve mainly subsisted on ginger ale today. Here’s a pathetic sickie picture for you:

this is what the flu looks like

I am feeling better after sleeping all day & hopefully I won’t be bowing to the porcelain throne again tonight. But me being sick is NO reason for YOU to not do some awesome yoga this week! I hope to be in full strength soon and stretching my sore body.  I heard a great quote in church this week from my pastor- “what we do with our bodies shapes our souls.” Isn’t that a good nugget? He was preaching on sex, but I think that applies to a lot of how we view and treat our bodies.  So, put on your stretchy pants like Jack Black and bust out some warrior poses.

sometimes, when you get older, men like to wear stretchy pants

Here is this weeks FREE Yoga resource. Yoga Journal has free podcasts that you can watch to limber up a little. I will tell you, this one is a GREAT workout. I did it a few weeks ago and could feel it for a couple days. I felt so strong afterwards! If you don’t like the one I provided the link to, just browse through the Yoga Journal site and find one that suits you better. Last week, I also recommended checking out a yoga DVD from your local library.  Especially if you live in towns that have a large amount of hippes living there, like Ithaca, NY- you will find that yoga dvd’s are the only one’s available in the exercise section, like I did when I visited my in-laws there this summer.  May your yuletide be merry and yoga-tastic.


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Categories : exercise


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