Comments for Sidewalk Theologian

Comment on my awkward valentine by Jessica

Jessica — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 17:56:45 +0000

Helen- that is a pretty horrifically awful v-day story. Boys can be so weird. It is funny to look back and laugh though isn’t it?

Comment on my awkward valentine by Helen

Helen — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 05:35:14 +0000

You’re getting my worst/only Valentine’s Day story. Several years ago, at the last minute, in a hurried and slightly desperate tone, a male friend of mine asked me to go to a Valentine’s dinner party with him that I was already planning to attend (alone, and with no shame). After I agreed, he said, “Great,” and walked away as fast as he could. I turned back to my group of giggly girls, and we giggled about it, but I didn’t think much else about it. When I arrived at the dinner party, I was bombarded by questions of friends, “Where have you been? What? You mean he didn’t pick you up? Didn’t he ask you to come with him? Aren’t you his date for the evening? I can’t believe you didn’t come together.” I had no good answer for them. When we sat down for dinner, I’m pretty sure the only reason he sat next to me is because there were place cards at each place, and ours were next to each other. And during the entire meal, he talked pleasantly with everyone else at the table, but I’m pretty certain he didn’t speak, or even once make eye contact, with me. By that point, the whole thing was so absurd, I just sat back, watched this guy ignore me, talk to my other friends who weren’t ignoring me, laugh to myself, and enjoy the evening.

Finally, at the end of the evening, I gave him the most innocuous, non-mushy Valentine’s Day card that I’d been able to find (I’d found it before I knew he was going to ignore me all evening, so I figured I wouldn’t waste the card), and wished him a happy Valentine’s Day. He did actually look at me at that point and thank me. And then he left. I found out later that when he’d asked the girl he really liked to be his date for this party, she told him she was going to be out of town. I can only assume that he panicked at that point, and in his desperation to not be alone at this party, he asked me.

The upside to this whole experience is that every time I retell the story, it gets funnier and funnier and I laugh more and more – so at least I’m getting a little ab workout. And, the Valentine’s Day bar has been set so low by this guy, that any future guy who asks me for a date on Valentine’s will only have to look me in the eye to be a better date.

Hope my story makes you laugh too.

Comment on when work and play collide by Mae Ellen Fick

Mae Ellen Fick — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 00:50:51 +0000

Yay! A great job! A great blog.

Comment on boot quest by Mae Ellen Fick

Mae Ellen Fick — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 20:19:43 +0000

Thanks for sharing.

Comment on boot quest by haller4307

haller4307 — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 07:39:28 +0000

I have one more comment. I completely understand about dressing professional and sometimes it’s not enough just to have a practical outfit…there are occasions where what you wear expresses the importance of the event. I know black church is a place where you wear your best to show that. At the same time, I feel like one question that has to be asked is how does a particular culture need to be transformed on this issue (and any issue)? Driving a nicer car might earn me more credibility in certain circles, but I’m still not sure I would get one just for that reason. An example for exaggeration, if having 50 pairs of adorable open-toed shoes would make me more credible to the So Cal white, evangelical moms group, I’m not sure that would be a convincing enough reason for me to participate in the trend. Sure if we look like we rolled out of bed then that actually may be a hindrance to having someone take us seriously in many circles, but dress for those who value a nice brand and an up-to-date look, I think we need to be cautious to live transformationally as well.

In other words, thank God for TJMaxx, where you get the max for the minimum, minimum price. Honestly.

One nice thing about both of your fashion posts is that you usually talk about the way to have a budget or bargain shop for something. In culture at large, having a budget and stewarding money is transformational. Maybe admitting you shop at TJMaxx could be transformational in certain circles as well.

Comment on boot quest by haller4307

haller4307 — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 20:36:33 +0000

thanks, friends

Comment on boot quest by Jessica

Jessica — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 19:16:22 +0000

yesss! putting together a smashing outfit is so much fun and does get at that artistic side!

Comment on boot quest by Jessica

Jessica — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 19:15:55 +0000

I really like the way you put that- admiring Louboutins or Manolos for their beauty and craft is similar to admiring a great painting or deep poem! It is amazing to see how designers put color, texture and fabrics together in such creative ways! Touché on not commenting on your fashion posts- I always read (and enjoy them!) but for some reason don’t feel compelled to comment- maybe I will now! I think on some level I’ve been nervous that if I post about fashion people will see me as frivolous, but enjoying it as a hobby- the way some enjoy football, running, or cooking and occasionally blog about it, is just a part of me I enjoy expressing and sharing with others.

Comment on boot quest by Jessica

Jessica — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 19:12:53 +0000

Lisa- I was really hoping you’d reply to this post (yes, I have secret desires for certain blog readers to comment!). You are always really thoughtful in this area. I think the name of the game is an awareness of contextulization- like Grace said- to dress up in the black community shows respect but wearing dressier clothes to minster in the inner city could become a barrier to relating to people. Being accessible as you say- whether it’s to the urban poor, the wealthy, stressed moms or college students really could be seen in the context of Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 9: “http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1+Corinthians+9%3A19-23&version=NIV” “I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some- I do this for the sake of the gospel.” I think there is always a balance between being content, enjoying putting together an aesthetically pleasing outfit, and not doing so to impress others.

Comment on boot quest by ignite2011

ignite2011 — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 16:32:41 +0000

…and such were all ready such great peeps, I love reading about your thoughts on boots or whatever… although I have noticed that when i post about fashion much less of my Christian peeps comments, even you.

I try not to feel too bad about that b/c it is something that Iove and really enjoy and blogging about it allows me to “play” without having to pay. =) I will probably never own a pair of Christian Louiboutons but I love being able to just look at them, or post about them b/c they are sooooo beautiful!!!! Like a great painting or a deep poem.

About what Lisa said, I find that in the black community, I often get the opposite response… putting myself together a little more is actually a way of showing my audience respect. I don’t do a lot of ministry with the poor (financially at least) so I haven’t needed to dress down in that sense, but I can see how that would be a good idea if I was doing a plunge or something like that. But my primary work on a college campus, means I need to look like a professor in order to gain respect amongst my peers, colleagues and students.

…..and that is just for me, like having toys, it’s just so much fun to think about.